Let Go and Be

Social Networking and the Archidocese of Philadelphia

In the local Church Bulletin, I was a bit surprised to see announcements that Cardinal Rigali has a Facebook fan page and the Archdiocese has a Twitter account too. It's interesting as when you see non-profits and Churches beginning to use social media that our world is changing in ways we had not anticipated. I find all of this a bit funny because I like to reflect back and remember back in 1989 when I first joined the ONIX bulletin board system (BBS). Back when I was using my Amiga computer using a 2400 baud modem, I used to connect to this service that allowed for 12 people to be online at the same time and send e-mail to each other, post messages on bulletin board systems and chat.

I used to love the chat as I could talk to people and you could interact with people by typing in a verb to hug people, tickle them, etc. And, of course, what would any chat room be without the whisper command? Back in 1989, I used this system as a means of communicating with people in my area and making new friends. My high school friend Bob told me about ONIX, I joined and then he and I met a lot of people whom we became friends with. We used to meet up, go bowling, hang out at diners, go to movies, etc.

Now with Facebook and Twitter people could find out where I am (literally) if I allowed a GPS app to post that information to the world. Seeing the Church embrace social networking, shows the change that's filtering through society. We're not in a world in which I can see something and post it to my followers within seconds. This can have its positives and negatives.

Personally, I don't like people knowing my exact geographic location. I also don't post many aspects of my life--though people who follow my feeds probably think I share a good amount. See, I rather like it that way.

With the Church, I looked at their messaging and it's essentially news releases and announcements about what the Church has done (raised money, where the Cardinal has been, etc.). It's not in any way engaging. And I hope that will change.

For me, social networking is about sharing a thought, a movie, an idea, a joke, music or a bit of yourself with your network. Depending on the network, with Facebook I'll share more personal details as those following me are people I have met and know personally. With Twitter, I'll be less open.

In times to come, it'll be interesting to see what the Church will do--as companies and organizations. But I have to laugh to think that I've been using early versions of these tools since 1989. ONIX might be worlds away with what Twitter is, but the idea of communicating with others is the same. Fast-forward 20 years from now--it'll be very interesting to see how social media has changed. I suspect it'll shock us with how far things are pushed. We shall see.

Unsettled

I have been unsettled in my personal life. Unsettled on many fronts, but as I look back over the years that's not unusual for me for this time of year. I've gone through some very difficult times through the month of May. When I was young, there were two big relationship breakups that left me reeling. And seven years ago my wife lost her father. That same May back in 2003 was several months before the birth of my son.

When I reflect and look back, I now realize why I was unsettled back then. Death and new life were all right around the corner. And younger and farther back, unsettled over my love life and understanding who I was and what I wanted out of life, loomed over me. May has been filled with change for me. Internal, external and swirling change. Not always change within my choice.

This May has been no exception as well as last May. There has been great change. Last May I made some sweeping changes in my personal life and this was before I had decided to go back to Church. Now, a year later, I look at this May and see the change that I've been involved in but it's been initiated by my wife and children. For me, there is also the internal struggle of finding a balance between what I need in life and what others need of me or need for themselves. Find that sweet spot can be challenging and tiring.

What I like to remind myself during these times is that life is a journey and I'm on it, day by day. Today I'm not feeling very close to God, dare I be honest and say that I feel hardly any connection at all. There have been days in which I shake my head and think what I fool I am to believe. And, no, I'm not going to say that I just hunker down, pray some more and then the rays of light come to heal me and all is good. Life isn't that simple for me. I make conscious choices in my life and I am an intelligent person who constantly questions. It is within my right and my belief that I know that I might never know if there is a God or not and that I might be wasting my time to pray to him. Yet, I have found that there are times in my life in which I can turn inward and listen to my inner voice and find a path that leads me onward.

What does it mean to be a good man? What does it mean to be a good father, son, husband, coworker or friend? For me, I believe in coming to terms with my feelings, talking with those I love and doing my best to do good in the world. If I die and that's all there is, then, yes, I might have been a fool to pray to God, but I like thinking about the optimism in the universe. I believe there is a greater purpose and that one day I will find out what that is. If I'm wrong, well, I deluded myself and no harm done.

In all the change and turmoil I feel in the month of May, I think it's all about growth and change. Doesn't matter if there is or isn't a God when it comes to this. It's up to me to look around, figure out where I want to go and do and then walk the walk. Choosing a path isn't always that easy. When I was young, deciding on what college to go to was a big thing. Then it was whether to study in France. As I've grown into different roles over the years, the challenges become more complicated. Deciding on what college to go to is a lot different than deciding how to best discipline your son when he is acting out. Or, how to find the patience with your two-year old daughter as she's trying to put her shoes on and won't let you help. My world has changed dramatically yet inside there is still that core of me who knows that writing will bring me calm as will listening to music going for a walk and looking up at the moon and the clouds passing by.

The life skills I've learned help ground me and enable me to get through the unsettling times so that I can shed the old and move on with the new. But no matter how much gray hair I have, there is still that essential question: What makes me happy?

In May (don't ask me why it's this month, I really don't know), I ask that more often than not and maybe it's the changing of the season that I sense the coming summer and warmth. My quest for joy, happiness and love is what it is. I live a lot inside my head and only those close to me or those who read what I write get a full sense of what makes me tick.

Tomorrow I am going to run my first half-marathon. The fact that I'm writing that is pretty startling to me as a year ago I would have laughed at you. It's not that I'm not fit, but I've never seen myself as athletic. I've always been the tall, lanky guy. But I've challenged myself in the last year and I'm working not only the muscles of my soul, heart, and mind, but of my body as well. The full package.

Today I've taken time off to work around the house and prepare for the run tomorrow. If I succeed, great, if not, well, I tried my best. Yet what I want to reflect on and acknowledge and share is the journey that I am on. I can be, at times, filled with doubt and confused and definitely tired. Yet I am trying to utilize the skills that will help me stay on my path through life.

Anyone who has kids knows how difficult it can be to hear your own voice. Half the time you hear only the kids' ("Daddy, I want my ball." "Daddy, can I have more milk.... Pleeeeeaaaaasssseee!") As May is almost over, I want to share that I've no idea where the journey is taking me. Will I be closer to God in weeks ahead or further away? I don't know. But what I do know is that I am working hard on trying to follow my bliss.

And, for right now, it's to be unsettled and to recognize that, embrace it and reflect on it. When I've done that enough, it'll be time to let that go and to move on.

Have a good one. Peace.

Episode 6: The Catholic Church and Sexual Abuse Scandals

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• Episode 6: The Catholic Church and Sexual Abuse Scandals  (34.2 MB)

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Total running time: 49 minutes and 47 seconds.

Links and Notes:

• In a statement, read out by Archbishop Silvano Maria Tomasi in September 2009, the Holy See  stated "We know now that in the last 50 years somewhere between 1.5% and 5% of the Catholic clergy has been involved in sexual abuse cases," adding that this figure was comparable with that of other groups and denominations.
• John Jay Report is a 2004 report by the John Jay College of Criminal Justice, commissioned by the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops, based on surveys completed by the Roman Catholic dioceses in the United States. Being the single most comprehensive study of clerical sexual abuse in the United States, it is the source of the most commonly cited statistics regarding the topic.
• This American Life podcast: Enemy Camp (originally aired on 7.18.03). "Act One: Confession: Patrick Wall was a special kind of monk. He was a fixer. The Catholic Church sent him to problem parishes where priests had been removed because of scandal. His job was to come in, keep events from going public and smooth things over until a permanent replacement priest was found. But after four different churches in four years, after covering up for pedophiles and adulterers and liars and embezzlers he decided to make a change."
• Priests' Victims forced into vow of silence. "The leader of the Catholic Church in Ireland resisted calls for his resignation yesterday, despite admitting that he took part in meetings where the victims of a pedophile priest were forced to take a vow of silence." March 15, 2010
• Vatican: Pope has immunity in sex abuse trials. Allegations that Pope Benedict XVI, formerly Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, knew of sexual abuse and did not act to defrock Reverend Lawrence Murphy who was accused of abusing 200 deaf boys has caused the Vatican to declare that as Head of State the Pope has immunity. April 1, 2010
• Pastoral Letter of His Holiness Benedict XVI to the Catholics of Ireland. March 19, 2010.
• Survivors Network for those Abused by Priests website to help those who have been abused.
  

Show Notes:

--Subscribe to the show in iTunes (it's free!).
--Discussion of the Catholic Church and the recent sexual abuse scandals.

What is the Let Go and Be Podcast?

The Let Go and Be podcast is a monthly audio podcast in which I discuss spirituality, religion, faith and growing up being Catholic. The show is a good mix between asking hard questions about faith and God and then relating that to living in the modern world. I'm on a journey to ask questions, interview people of different faiths and to discussion religion from a viewpoint of tolerance. So download the show, listen and have fun!

Creative Commons License:

Let Go and Be Podcast by Ron Vitale is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Contact Us:

• To send feedback, send an e-mail to letgoandjustbe@gmail.com.
• Voice feedback is encouraged. Please send your .wav or .mp3 audio clip (under 3 minutes please) to the e-mail listed above.

Should the Pope Have Immunity in Sex Abuse Trials?

I am concerned. As a Catholic, who has recently come back to the fold, I have been seeing news articles popping up on CNN and MSNBC over the last few weeks about a sex abuse scandal that involves several high ranking Church officials, including the Pope. Yesterday I read an article that reports that the Vatican claims that the Pope, as a head of state, has immunity and cannot testify at any trial. Honestly, I was a bit stunned by the news. What are my thoughts on this?

I took a step back and tried to think of myself, not as a Catholic, but as a person, objectively looking at the situation. If wrong was done and Church officials did not hand over information to the police all those years ago, there is an injustice that has taken place. Church officials knew of the abuse, reassigned the priest and he abused more children. According to a Vatican official "...the pope is protected by diplomatic immunity because more than 170 countries, including the United States, have diplomatic relations with the Vatican. They recognize it as a sovereign state and the pope as its sovereign head."

What is interesting is that the Vatican is coming out swinging having complained that the New York Times is "in attack mode." The statements coming out of the Vatican deny "any cover-up over the abuse of 200 deaf boys in the United States by Reverend Lawrence Murphy from 1950 to 1974." But The New York Times reports that "the Vatican and Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, now Pope Benedict, were warned about Murphy but he was not defrocked."

What is the truth? Who is lying? Or is no one lying but the facts aren't clear? What's bothersome is that over the last several decades there have been major sexual abuse cases that have come to light. I have read reports of how Church officials in Ireland (back in 1975) asked young boys to take a vow of silence so that they would not tell anyone of the sexual abuse that they suffered. And in Philadelphia, reports surfaced that Cardinal Krol and Archbishop Bevilacqua had been part of a sexual abuse cover-up, "transferr[ing] accused priests to other parishes throughout the archdiocese."

Am I talking about the Church? The Catholic Church? Yes, I am. Many children have suffered. I am not saying that all priests are bad and that the Catholic Church is filled with evil men and women running it. No. But I am saying that people are human and we all make mistakes and people can do horrible things to each other. Personally, I do not believe in celibacy for priests. I believe priests should have the option to marry. Peter, our first Pope, was married. Why shouldn't priests be married now?

Trying to deny human sexuality as part of you, in my opinion, is not healthy. We are sexual beings. Yes, we can choose not be sexual, but why are all these children being sexually abused by priests? How can children be protected from being abused? And how can you know if a priest would harm your children or not? Honestly, I would not feel comfortable with my children being alone with a priest. It's not that I distrust everyone, but I'd rather play it safe.

The Catholic Church sticks to its beliefs and is sometimes very narrow minded. Over the years as I have matured, some of my opinions have changed. I have realized I was wrong in some of my beliefs and I have admitted them. Maybe it's time for the Catholic Church to address all these sexual abuse scandals and come up with a plan to deal with the problem, reporting this to the world rather than coming out with statements that "the Pope is immune" to testifying in a trial. And if plans and rules have been implemented that I and the public are not aware of, why isn't the Vatican communicating this to the media?

At the end of the day, we want to see priests who abuse children to be defrocked and to be tried in the criminal system and we want our children to be safe. Let's stop pointing fingers and get results to protect other children.

As for the Pope, if he willingly decided not to handle the sexual abuse case and did not hand over the information to the authorities he was wrong. Pope or not, he's a man just like the rest of us. I don't think he should be protected with immunity. Shouldn't he be held accountable? What do you think?

Playing on the Floor in Church

My wife and I took the kids to Palm Sunday mass this morning and it was a bit hectic with our two year old trying to climb all over the place and our six year old kicking the back of the pew in front of him. Going to mass as a parent takes on a whole new meaning. What did the priest say during the homily? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah is about all I was able to make out as I was trying my best to calm my daughter down. And my wife: Where did she get the patience to when our daughter started screaming at the top of her lungs: "No!" (She had wanted to walk in front of us and move over to her big brother so they could play together.

Late in the mass, I noticed that a mom to the left of us had two little girls. One was under a year and the second was near two. My older son and the near two year old started talking. Not to be outdone, my daughter fought her way over and, at one point, all three kids were on the ground, coloring. It kept them quiet and, for a few moments, it was funny to see. Our daughter kept calling the girl her "little sister" and they became fast friends, sharing crayons and coloring books--all squeezed on the floor between the pew and the kneeler.

During the peace be with you, I reached over to the woman on my left (mom to the two little girls) and I shook her hand with a knowing smile that she returned. We were in church, the kids were playing nice and although they were on the floor, no screaming was taking place. At the end of the day, it was a win for everyone!

Don't Throw Stones

I went to 6:30am mass this morning and I saw a man in his 40s putting his arm around his young son. They were at Church together. I watched them and started thinking about my past. I've uploaded a picture of me from when I was a little kid. It's of my mother and I. I started thinking about my father and how he just wasn't in my life from the time I was 5 onward and I saw the man in Church with his son and I felt an ache inside. I missed my son (and daughter!). He is sleeping over at his grandmother's house.

As mass went on, I listened to today's gospel (John 8: 1-11) and tried to put life into perspective. Jesus was being tested and the Elders wanted him to stone to death a woman who had committed adultery. But instead He asks those who had never sinned to throw the first stone. One by one, the Elders all leave. Jesus turned to the woman and said, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?" She replied, "No one, sir." Then Jesus replied, "Neither do I condemn you. Go, and from now on do not sin any more."

The priest who gave this morning's homily pulled out a large stone and finished up by banging it on the podium. He asked us to reflect on what a stone of that size would do if we would throw it at someone. He asked us to realized that God wants us to not cast stones at each other and to show that God isn't a vengeful God, but one of forgiveness. He slammed the rock down, said the word forgiveness and was finished. Pulling back, I like to just think. How many years was I angry at my father and wanted to throw stones at him? Probably close to 20 or more years. There comes a point in which I had to stand up for my own actions and behaviors and become me. I needed to shed the skin of my past and become me. To be me.

I could easily point fingers and blame at my father, but what would that do except make me weak, a complainer and someone casting stones. Today is 2010 and not 1976. Today I have a son and a daughter who need me and want to develop a father/child relationship with me. The complexity of inter-generational decisions is rather amazing. I look at how I was treated as a child and now I am the father and I see my children.

I have cast (and probably will cast in the future) many stones. I do not like to be wronged and I have been known to carry grudges. But today, on this second day of spring, I wanted to just point out that freedom can be obtained by letting go--of one's past, of your faults or the wrongs you have done. To cast a stone at others can also be very easy to do to myself. So for today, I want to put all the stones down and build something with them. Shelter or an observatory. To build something good with the tool rather than use a stone as a weapon.

Episode 5: A Young Catholic's Journey

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• Episode 5: A Young Catholic's Journey  (57.1 MB)

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Total running time: 1 hour 23 minutes and 14 seconds.

:00 - 2:01 What is the podcast about?
2:02 - 20:23 Natalie's story (early years).
20:24 - 22:29 Her spiritual turning point.
22:30 - 32:59 Natalie's story cont. (high school years)
33:00 - 34:00 C. S. Lewis.
34:01-37:59 Natalie's story (college years)
38:00-39:20 George Harrison's influence.
39:21-46:59 Hinduism's influence on her.
47:00- 51:40 Cont. college years and being a teacher's assistant
51:41 - 58:00 Listening to intuition and follow your Bliss (Joseph Campbell)
58:01 - 1:05:00 The importance of the Let Go and Be podcast: Ron's hopes for it.
1:05:01 - 1:07:00 C. S. Lewis' "Problem with Pain," and Natalie's giving herself over to God.
1:07:01 - 1:10:01 Praying to God for a sign.
1:10:02 - 1:12:00 Sherry: Bringing Natalie back to faith.
1:12:01 - 1:18:22 God speaks to you in the silence
1:18:23 - 1:23:14 Conclusion

Show Notes:

--Subscribe to the show in iTunes (it's free!).
--Interview with Natalie, who was raised Catholic, left the faith and has now returned. Hear her story as she explains how she came back to the Church and why. 

What is the Let Go and Be Podcast?

The Let Go and Be podcast is a monthly audio podcast in which I discuss spirituality, religion, faith and growing up being Catholic. The show is a good mix between asking hard questions about faith and God and then relating that to living in the modern world. I'm on a journey to ask questions, interview people of different faiths and to discussion religion from a viewpoint of tolerance. So download the show, listen and have fun!

Creative Commons License:

Let Go and Be Podcast by Ron Vitale is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Contact Us:

• To send feedback, send an e-mail to letgoandjustbe@gmail.com.
• Voice feedback is encouraged. Please send your .wav or .mp3 audio clip (under 3 minutes please) to the e-mail listed above.

The Prodigal Son

My wife and I took our children to Church this morning and, as luck would have it, the gospel was the Prodigal Son. For those of you interested in an in depth look at my review of the book "The Prodigal God," be sure to read my blog post. Our priest gave a nice homily about the gospel passage but between bad acoustics in the Church (the microphone system didn't carry his voice well as neither my wife or I could easily make out what he was saying) and my two-year old climbing all over me and not wanting to sit still, I wasn't able to hear all that the priest had to say. I do remember him saying that, at its most simplest, the parable is about God's willingness to forgive you no matter what you've done.

However, I wanted to take a step back. Far, far back. Let's take all semblance of God away from this parable as I want to make a point for those who are not believers in God. The story is pretty straightforward but there is much complexity to it: A young son wants his money to go explore the world and find his way. When he does receive his money from his father, he goes off, loses everything and then chooses to come back home. The young son asks for forgiveness, receives it and his father throws a big party for him. The eldest son is angry as he's been breaking his back and never get to have any fun. So, at its core, what are we to learn from this?

For me, being the eldest, I need to remember that doing what "is right" and good, following the letter of the law doesn't always pay. At the end of the day, it's important to make certain that you are doing something because you want to do it and not because you should. And the father, what about him? Personally, I think it's important to not throw away a son's inheritance so the child can squander all your wealth, but more importantly, it's necessary to let your children go. They will make their own mistakes and they need to find their own way. I suspect as my kids get older that this will become increasingly difficult for me to do. And what about the young son? He goes off, wastes all his money on women and booze. Then he comes back, says he's sorry and all is forgiven. There are consequences to our behavior but I believe that it's necessary that we listen to our inner voice--"To thine own self be true." Following that voice and "following one's bliss," Is not easy as the road is filled with challenges. Often we may be misunderstood, mocked, deserted and alone. If the road you choose to take is wrong and leads you to a dead end, then what? The young son chooses to come back and asks for forgiveness. His father does not hold a grudge against him but explains to the eldest son that your brother "who was dead" has been brought back to life.

For me, I like looking at the parable in Jungian terms, seeing that there are different aspects of my personality reflected in each major character. At times in my life, I am the father, the young son and the eldest. As I go along my path in life, there will be choices that I make that will be difficult and not understood. I might (and have) make the wrong choice. But in the end, it's important to grow, learn, accept fault and acknowledge it and move on. Keep moving toward one's Personal Legend to hear the Soul of the World.

Dying a Little Bit Each Day

Yesterday the kids and I were down the shore. We had stayed overnight with friends and went to Church as two families the next morning. During the homily portion of the mass, twelve young kids were brought up before the priest as they made their official request to participate in the sacrament of confirmation. I rather liked that, of their own free will, they had to request, before the congregation, their intentions to be confirmed. Yes, it was a bit of formality, and the kids had their papers with them so they could read along with what they were supposed to do, but I liked how the priest kept hitting home that it was their choice. They needed to choose and that it took a lot of hard work from teachers and parents to help the kids get to where they were now.

When I was in sixth grade and was studying for the sacrament of confirmation, I was told that the Holy Spirit would descend on me and I would become a soldier of Christ. As Cardinal Krol (Archbishop of Philadelphia during the '80s) was to confirm us, we had to memorize the answers to 112 questions. I don't remember any of the questions now, but I remember hours upon hours of studying. During the confirmation, I remember looking around waiting for the moment when the Holy Spirit would descend on me and I would then be able to see the devils and the angels floating around me all the time. You see, in my 11 year old mind, that's what I was going to see after I had the sacrament. I would be part of a secret club of Catholics who could fight for God like the Archangel Michael.

To say that I wasn't expecting a light tap on the cheek and some gooey, cold oil on my forehead would be all that I would experience is a bit of an understatement. I walked back from the front of the Church and I couldn't see the demons and devils. Nor could I see angels. I went back into the pew and shrugged, wondering what had happened.

My wife and I often have a discussion that goes something like this:

Me: "Do other people really talk and think about what's going on? I mean really think about things?"
My wife: "I don't know. Maybe."

Deep down in the core of me is this ringing swirl of energy that makes me want to grab people by the hand and point around and ask, "Do you see that? No, really, do you? Do you feel that? Is that what you feel, too?"

When I was 11 years of age, I expected to fight off evil incarnate as I did in my Dungeons & Dragons adventures that I used to write up. My friends and I fought through the nine levels of hell often and had even traveled to Hades with our characters. I had dreamed it up, written up the stories and used the D&D rule books to make it all come to life. That was the kid in me, trying to take evil and adversity in the world and make it into something that I could see, touch and fight.

Little did I know that the struggle of being an adult would be so much more complicated and insidious. There comes a point in your life in which you have to settle. You realize what you want, what you can't have and how to find a compromise between what you always hoped and dreamed for and the little death that takes each day. These are the words that many people don't talk about because it's uncomfortable and possibly embarrassing. Or, worse yet, people are unaware (that's more frightening if you ask me). Now that I am 39 years of age, I have seen good people fighting for what they believe, but they are beaten down by life. They have made bad choices or made good choices but have fallen on hard times. Worst are those who have sacrificed all they believed in because they cannot make money from it and have "sold out" to do something just for the money. But it's more than that. Much, much more.

Take a moment to just stop. Sit down. Go outside, sit on the grass and clear your mind. How many people do you know who are living in pain in unhappy marriages, or are divorced or are working jobs that they despise with all their might but need the money to pay their bills? How idealistic I was when I was in my early '20s as I thought I would be a novelist and just write for a living. A living. I did not even understand what that meant. I didn't understand what the challenges would become and how, over time, they would increasingly become more complex and that my very well-being would be tied into what I needed to thrive and what the public world would see in me.

A friend of mine from Russia once said to me: "When I first came to America, people would ask me: 'How are you doing?' It took me a few months to realize that they only wanted me to say 'okay' and not hear how I really felt." I remember hearing her tell me that and a part of me went out to her that day because I knew what she meant. How many of us truly take time to live or are we content and complacent with the false world around us?

Let's take God out of this for the moment. How much of your life do you do things because you want to rather than you "should"? This is not a post for me to point fingers or to say that I'm so much better than you. God knows and those who love me know, the struggles I have encountered over the years fighting for my identity. Is it popular to do the things that I do? No, it isn't. I used to care about fitting in but now I want to live each day as a gift. All of us have strings attached to us. We are pulled by work (hopefully, fulfilling work), family, responsibilities, and the trappings of life.

How often have you really taken the moment to tell someone how you truly feel? What you really want? Have you given yourself the freedom to live inside? All sound New Agey and hooky to you? Really? Are you truly fulfilled in living your life? Seriously, are you? Maybe you are, but I would bet that you've not listened. The trappings of life are all around you and I'm no man with a secret. I'm not.

I know the simple things. If you love someone, tell them. If you have friends, be a friend to them. If you've screwed up with your kids, apologize. Teach them. Listen to them. Work hard, but play, too. Play like a child would and make and do something different. How many thousands do I see each day with their dull eyes on the train? A little death takes place each day. A little dying as they compromise more of their spirit.

I may not be able to see devils and angels flying around, but I see complacency and people who have just plain given up. Given up on life and the dreams they had. If you believe in God and, like the kids who are choosing to accept the Holy Spirit and be confirmed, what could you do each day to live. And for those of you who do not believe in God, Spring is coming. I hear the birds outside now chirping as I write this. What dream have you allowed to die as you've sacrificed it by "growing up"? Do you want to paint, run a marathon, get a more fulfilling job, find the love of your life, be better with your kids--what really is it? I don't need to know. Only you do. Self-reflect, listen and be.

People are always amazed (I hate this to be honest) at "how much I do." Why the hell do I do this? The writing, the podcasting, the crazy stuff I do. Why? Because I would be dying a little each day if I didn't. Because the little boy inside of me who wanted to grow up to be a writer and to share his pain with others through stories of greatness and wonder still believes that I can do it. Because, in the end, I will turn back to dust and be nothing and I want to be remembered for fighting for what I love and believe in. I am not a passive person. I will climb the highest mountain or, (hardest for me), be the patient tree blowing in the wind. I think, desire and will be.

I pray you will choose not to die a little each day. Don't sell out on your hopes and dreams and beliefs. If you can't have all that you want, allow yourself to hold onto some of the magic inside. Trust me, you'll be so happy that you did.

Episode 4: Recovering Catholic

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• Episode 4: Recovering Catholic  (49.2 MB)

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Total running time: 1 hour 11 minutes and 38 seconds.

:00 - 16:35 Karen's upbringing
16:36 - 30:48 Karen's father's influence on her and religion.
30:49 - 33:40 Ron going back to Church and Karen not being called back. She was not happy to be going back to Church.
33:41 - 37:45 Question: What do you believe and why about God?
37-46 - 39:59 Karen and Ron on their beliefs.
40:01-48:00 Karen responds to what she sees in their relationship to be regrading religion
48:01-50:07 Ron's point of view about raising kids with religion.
50:08-53:24 Sharing religious views with the kids.
53:25- 56:00 Church: Understanding Ron's motivation in going back to Church
56:01 - 58:20: Continued: Ron going back to Church. Why?
58:21 - 1:02:12 Mention of the Flying spaghetti monster. Karen worried: Did Ron's expectations of her beliefs come into play?
1:02:13 - 1:06:36 Public faith or not? Join a community or start one?
1:06:37 - 1:10:29 Can people talk about religion in a public sphere?
1:10:30 - 1:11:38 Conclusion

Show Notes:

--Subscribe to the show in iTunes (it's free!).
--Interview with Karen Vitale who was raised Catholic and now describes herself as a recovering Catholic. In raising two kids and being married to the host of the Let Go and Be podcast who is a Catholic (recently returned to the faith), where does she stand and what does religion mean to her? 

What is the Let Go and Be Podcast?

The Let Go and Be podcast is a monthly audio podcast in which I discuss spirituality, religion, faith and growing up being Catholic. The show is a good mix between asking hard questions about faith and God and then relating that to living in the modern world. I'm on a journey to ask questions, interview people of different faiths and to discussion religion from a viewpoint of tolerance. So download the show, listen and have fun!

Creative Commons License:

Let Go and Be Podcast by Ron Vitale is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Contact Us:

• To send feedback, send an e-mail to letgoandjustbe@gmail.com.
• Voice feedback is encouraged. Please send your .wav or .mp3 audio clip (under 3 minutes please) to the e-mail listed above.